Thoughtofasweak wrote:
I too am in the same boat - my husband has been in my daughter's life since she was the age of 2, and was molesting her for 4 years until I found out about it in May. My daughter will be 16 next month.
This is a difficult situation you are going through, but only you can make the decision of staying with your husband or leaving him. No one else can make that decision. Only you can determine if he is truely repentant and wants to seek help, or if he is playing you. Visit him, talk with him - try to get a true since of his remorse.
I disagree with those who said that you will send the wrong message if you decide to forgive him and give him a chance to prove himself. My daughter knows that I fully support her, and I advocate on her behalf - what she wants. She knows that my first priority is her. She has also come to forgive the only father in her life and she sees the changes in my husband. She is willing to allow him to prove himself (just not living with us).
MY OPINION____This broad isnt "weak" she is "Brain-dead" and a HUGE embarrassment to other women.
These posters dont realize it, but the common denominator among them? Most have been fractured by the Men in their lives and rather than making adult decisions that may be the hardest thing they will ever confront? They leave it to prayer and of course the other fractured members who influence them in negative innuendos and the need to daily correspond with others who will validate their fractured lives and the miserable decisions they have made. They feed off each other and call themselves a support group. You wont find much healthy support here. And of course Derek Logue is high profile and has found his nest with these women who do nothing but validate his pathetic need to be embraced by the very segment of society he violated against. The fact these women dont have their own registry is amazing to me.
Sunday, September 9, 2012
another tale of woe and a perfect RSOL mindset
Now this one is very telling of the mindsets of women who are involved with sex offenders and are some of the loudest voices in RSOL. If you dont think this one is fucked up then nothing will shock you?
Hcjfctc is a very vocal RSOL voice around the web: Out of her mouth and onto the web we have this in response to Mystified123:
and I quote from her stupid mouth : ""That is a tough situation. My husband touched a neighbor girl, so I understand your confusion and uncertainty. However, I honestly believe if it had been our daughter, I'd be gone. I couldn't do that to her. (She may not have realized it but what she said was its ok to abuse someone else's child that can be forgiven and I am willing to "stand by my man" as long as it was another familes child who was sexually abused..
Claire53- chimed in with "What a terribly complex and difficult experience for all concerned. The good news is, your daughter is not a little girl. She is a young woman, and, I assume, looks like a young woman"
What does that mean Claire? Why include that in a response? Does her maturity aspect give a pass to the "stepfather"? sure sounds like it..
and of course while Mystified doesnt realize it she has officially folded with "I don't know if my daughter will ever come to the point of being able to give him another chance. I am afraid, if I choose him one day in the future she will resent me. I have decided to lay it all down and just focus on taking care of myself, my children and get through my graduate program. I asked him to leave us some space for a while so that I could heal. He will keep in touch through skype, email and telephone while seeking out a 12 step program for SA and a ministry that can help sort his own stuff out.
Another family bites the dust under the "guise" of I will blame it on addiction and not the pure truth that my husband isnt worth the ink to write his name, but rather than admitting I made a poor choice in a life partner I'll stick it out and leave it in GODS hands..(that way I can play martyr while throwing my daughter under the bus) and round and round we go..
Hcjfctc is a very vocal RSOL voice around the web: Out of her mouth and onto the web we have this in response to Mystified123:
and I quote from her stupid mouth : ""That is a tough situation. My husband touched a neighbor girl, so I understand your confusion and uncertainty. However, I honestly believe if it had been our daughter, I'd be gone. I couldn't do that to her. (She may not have realized it but what she said was its ok to abuse someone else's child that can be forgiven and I am willing to "stand by my man" as long as it was another familes child who was sexually abused..
Claire53- chimed in with "What a terribly complex and difficult experience for all concerned. The good news is, your daughter is not a little girl. She is a young woman, and, I assume, looks like a young woman"
What does that mean Claire? Why include that in a response? Does her maturity aspect give a pass to the "stepfather"? sure sounds like it..
and of course while Mystified doesnt realize it she has officially folded with "I don't know if my daughter will ever come to the point of being able to give him another chance. I am afraid, if I choose him one day in the future she will resent me. I have decided to lay it all down and just focus on taking care of myself, my children and get through my graduate program. I asked him to leave us some space for a while so that I could heal. He will keep in touch through skype, email and telephone while seeking out a 12 step program for SA and a ministry that can help sort his own stuff out.
Another family bites the dust under the "guise" of I will blame it on addiction and not the pure truth that my husband isnt worth the ink to write his name, but rather than admitting I made a poor choice in a life partner I'll stick it out and leave it in GODS hands..(that way I can play martyr while throwing my daughter under the bus) and round and round we go..
and even more dysfunction
Mystified 123 wrote: torn between divorce or reconciliationPosted on 09/04/12, 12:07 pm
1)My husband about 2 months ago molested my daughter of 15 by touching her inappropriately while I was at work. I called the cops and had him arrested. He had raised her since she was 3 years old so I see it as extremely sick that he do such a thing. He tells me that he is repentant now and wants to get help. He says the reason he believes he did such a thing was has become addicted to porn and drank alcohol on the night of the offense. (ahh the I got drunk and watched porn and went after anything with a warm body excuse) always a favorite?? The bottom line is after much back and forth by various members she is folding like a cheap suit and throwing her daughter under the bus with this last comment, "He tells me that he is repentant now and wants to get help. He says the reason he believes he did such a thing was has become addicted to porn and drank alcohol on the night of the offense. He has asked that I wait for him to go through treatment and change to prove that he is different."" MY OBSERVATION? Financially she is between a rock and a hard place and as many women in this group I have observed many of their opinions are centered on that aspect. Too bad they arent realizing these guys are gonna cost them so much more than the rent money.. the other question is where was she while his addiction to porn was growing? How good of a provider and husband could he have been prior to the incident while feeding a porn and alcohol addictions? My recommendation? Mystified should stand back and consider herself lucky by ridding herself of this Not so BlueRibbon example of breeding stock.
1)My husband about 2 months ago molested my daughter of 15 by touching her inappropriately while I was at work. I called the cops and had him arrested. He had raised her since she was 3 years old so I see it as extremely sick that he do such a thing. He tells me that he is repentant now and wants to get help. He says the reason he believes he did such a thing was has become addicted to porn and drank alcohol on the night of the offense. (ahh the I got drunk and watched porn and went after anything with a warm body excuse) always a favorite?? The bottom line is after much back and forth by various members she is folding like a cheap suit and throwing her daughter under the bus with this last comment, "He tells me that he is repentant now and wants to get help. He says the reason he believes he did such a thing was has become addicted to porn and drank alcohol on the night of the offense. He has asked that I wait for him to go through treatment and change to prove that he is different."" MY OBSERVATION? Financially she is between a rock and a hard place and as many women in this group I have observed many of their opinions are centered on that aspect. Too bad they arent realizing these guys are gonna cost them so much more than the rent money.. the other question is where was she while his addiction to porn was growing? How good of a provider and husband could he have been prior to the incident while feeding a porn and alcohol addictions? My recommendation? Mystified should stand back and consider herself lucky by ridding herself of this Not so BlueRibbon example of breeding stock.
another interesting day on the web
I ran across a website the other day and needless to say it validates my theories on the WOMEN who choose offenders over their own and or their childrens self preservation. An casual observer of these women and their post will find themselves shaking their head and asking themselves "what can they possibly be thinking"?
1) Cantbemylife wrote: The girl he had an affair with has major mommy/daddy issues and he said that she kept persuing him. He says she does not look or act 15yo and yes she does look older. He is having a hard time managing all of these things he is supposed to be doing like spending time with the kids and me and the counselor and lawyer. (She mentions she has three children) An "affair" means her husband repeatedly tapped this 15 year old on muliple occations but its inferred he was oblivious to her age, or he was just tapping what was there for the taking either way? He threw his wife and children under the bus for an underage girl who has now become the pariah and he the victim??
2) Amymesa responded: I came to the conclusion that the 15 yr old girl MUST have serious mom/dad issues, probably doesnt really know her dad and mom probably gets high..i knew so many girls like that growing up. And they did in fact do things like have sex with older married men. Im sure im going to get plenty of shit for this, but if this girl is anything like the white trash (sorry if that offends anyone, but its true) that I went to school with, than sorry, the only person she is a victim of is herself.
Then the "group" goes on to offer advice to the woman to look for signs of remorse?? I'll bet he has plenty after that introduction to the judge and that "come to Jesus moment" and realizing that the "wife" is going to be the only one sending money to the commissary. Not the 15 year old. This group is encouraging her to stick it out with the freak, "misery really does love Company" ..
1) Cantbemylife wrote: The girl he had an affair with has major mommy/daddy issues and he said that she kept persuing him. He says she does not look or act 15yo and yes she does look older. He is having a hard time managing all of these things he is supposed to be doing like spending time with the kids and me and the counselor and lawyer. (She mentions she has three children) An "affair" means her husband repeatedly tapped this 15 year old on muliple occations but its inferred he was oblivious to her age, or he was just tapping what was there for the taking either way? He threw his wife and children under the bus for an underage girl who has now become the pariah and he the victim??
2) Amymesa responded: I came to the conclusion that the 15 yr old girl MUST have serious mom/dad issues, probably doesnt really know her dad and mom probably gets high..i knew so many girls like that growing up. And they did in fact do things like have sex with older married men. Im sure im going to get plenty of shit for this, but if this girl is anything like the white trash (sorry if that offends anyone, but its true) that I went to school with, than sorry, the only person she is a victim of is herself.
Then the "group" goes on to offer advice to the woman to look for signs of remorse?? I'll bet he has plenty after that introduction to the judge and that "come to Jesus moment" and realizing that the "wife" is going to be the only one sending money to the commissary. Not the 15 year old. This group is encouraging her to stick it out with the freak, "misery really does love Company" ..
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